I don't think brook has ever known best
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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