Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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