My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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