well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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