i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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