I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
