So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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