you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
