Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I'm too high and old for this...
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
