Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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