either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize