i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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