I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
