One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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