Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize