ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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