Is it because I queefed?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
