Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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