I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
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