I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
