Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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