I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
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