Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
