What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
