Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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