I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize