Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize