You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
