butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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