My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
