C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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