i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
