I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
