I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize