I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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