Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
