I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
