Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
