I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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