a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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