these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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