so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
