My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
