Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
