writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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