Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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