You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
