you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
