under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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