im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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