therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
