Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I want a musical about memes.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
